I'm going to tell you a little about Hypothetical Heather and some of the twits who "know her" (not biblically or anything), on Twitter, who are winners all around! You see, "Heather" is every woman, the worst and the best of us. She is a hypothetical woman made up during a conversation about commas....*
If there is a name in the middle of a sentence "Thanks Heather for washing my window" where does the comma go?
All depends on the context. Heather went to the mall with Debbie to buy a top. Or... Heather went to the mall with her stepmom, Debbie, to buy a top.
Ohhh. It's bad to have a name in the middle of the sentence?
No. Thanks, Heather, for washing my windows. But it should really be Heather, thanks for washing my windows.
What about "Thanks for washing my windows, Heather." ....or "It's time for a career change, Heather."
Thanks for breaking the copy machine, Heather. Thanks for stealing my thunder, Heather.
Thanks for nothing, Heather. You crazy whore.
Why are you being mean to Heather?
She's the unfortunate victim of a grammar lesson. Also? She's a whore.
Sorry, Heather, for calling you a whore. We shouldn't have done that, Heather.
Even though it's true, Heather.
Heather has, among other things, poor grammar.
Oh Heather, why must you be such a megabitch? You gotta stop doing that, Heather!
You'll never believe what that bitch, Heather, did today. Heather made my house a total mess then forced me to eat a whole bag of chips.
Heather made me stay up late drinking wine and eating chocolate! Thanks, Heather.
What a bitch!
The Bearded Iris:
I heard that Heather smells. Sometimes she makes me drink too much. I kinda like her.
She smells the worst! Heather made me drink last night. Sometimes I don't hate her.
The Bearded Iris:
I like this game. I'm keeping Heather. I need her in my house to blame for my farts and stuff.
That's fine. Heather made me squishy and pot bellied with her drinking and cheese eating. Thanks, Heather.
Heather made me have hairy legs for weeks when she stole my razor. My husband really doesn't like Heather.
Heather is such an unsexy lady. She loves fat pants and pajamas. Careful, she will take you down with her.
And this is what happens when women drink wine...
What has Heather done to you lately?
On another note, Sarcasm Goddess bestowed a little shout-out award/meme on me!
|It's an Oscar, except not, but sort of. And Heather got jealous.|
and the Tell Me About Yourself goes to..
Tell Me About Yourself Award Winners
Good Girl Gone Redneck
Flourish in Progress
Linus & Bubba
The Bearded Iris
I Have Issues
Sarcasm in Action
Not Just a Baker
Reading and Chickens
Adventures in Estrogen
A Bozo's Abozzo
Winners - tell us 7 things about yourself, list some bloggers your read, link back to this blog, and have a lovely weekend!! It's an award and a token of appreciation for all that you do - and to remind you that we love reading you!!
Thanks Sarcasm Goddess!
*and Transformed Non-Conformist